My Story, My Song

My story
My song
Meaningless words
Written for only me
I laugh with tears in these tired eyes
Memories holding me together
I remember the days I felt lighter
That anything seemed possible
That the future was yet to be written
Now I am stuck, my life on repeat
I live the mistakes over and over again
Punishing myself
Tearing myself apart a little at a time
There is no break in the clouds today
The rain falls
Leaving stains upon my heart
Traces of only who I was
Now only meaning of what I am
And the person I became
So far from where was planned
How to escape without disappearing
Or maybe I already have
I've given up and walked away
When things got hard
Undependable, I have been
Unable to count on myself
The walls close in
Keeping me hidden
Protection from myself
Fading into the background
I mourn the loss of hope
There is no room for me to turn
No space to breathe
Its a lot like suffocating
Being in this life is exhausted
The reserves of feelings
That I once had
I pulled the plug on this drain
Keeping things only created
Less space for me to exist
I've sold out all the things
That made me who I once was
But these words I hold
Are the last thing
Now I release them
Taking pride one last time
From something that was just mine
That only existed for a moment in time
Now its out there for others to share
To take and to make their own
But in the beginning it was my story
The melody was my song
And it haunts me still